Today I feel quite anxious because the waiting is getting to be too long to get started with treatment and/or radiation. I opted not to go to Boston for it because the drive would be too stressful to do every day for 6.5 weeks. The first apt with the sister hospital in Exeter is not until next Friday and the secretary said the doc may not even decide to do the mapping/planning for radiation that day. I am wondering if I should get started on the chemo and do a "sandwich" method with 2 Cisplatin treatments, followed by radiation and then the last 2 treatments. I'm also a bit perplexed because the test that I had done with the chemo sensitivity lab recommended use of 3 chemo drugs that were effective in the lab against my particular tumor, and yet it looks like they are starting with just one of the 3. I need to understand why because this lab seems to understand specifically what would work, and yet, it seems to be tough to get my doctor to consider the recommendation from an outside lab. The dictated interpretation of the report has also since arrived from CA, so I am hoping this will be considered. I am clear on the fact that I need to hit this on all sides and time is of the essence. Home and naturopathic remedies are helpful but in my heart I know it may not be enough...especially after learning more about the drivers of my tumor tissue and specific sensitiveness that the tissue has to agents as tested by Rational Therapeutics.
The other thing to discover is the genetic side of things. Foundation Medicine in Cambridge is in now processing another block of my tissue to analyze 315 genes and potential issues. That should be useful information, but my oncologist said we may not be able to act upon any of it because I am technically not in a metastasis situation, which is a state I hope to never experience:) The mental anguish is really affecting me today and it is a weary task to see the right course of action when I feel like I have to keep advocating for myself. With the holidays approaching I just want to be able to enjoy them and not have to deal with all of this right now! Yep, I'm having an off day, but it's to be expected I guess to stumble on occasion...I would not be human if I was always in a positive state of mind:( I'm going to lift this cloud on this rainy day somehow!
The other thing to discover is the genetic side of things. Foundation Medicine in Cambridge is in now processing another block of my tissue to analyze 315 genes and potential issues. That should be useful information, but my oncologist said we may not be able to act upon any of it because I am technically not in a metastasis situation, which is a state I hope to never experience:) The mental anguish is really affecting me today and it is a weary task to see the right course of action when I feel like I have to keep advocating for myself. With the holidays approaching I just want to be able to enjoy them and not have to deal with all of this right now! Yep, I'm having an off day, but it's to be expected I guess to stumble on occasion...I would not be human if I was always in a positive state of mind:( I'm going to lift this cloud on this rainy day somehow!